Torn between two lovers, feeling like a fool, loving you both is breaking all the rules! Loving two people does not break all of the rules, but, having two lovers and leading them to believe that they are the only one in your life, does, break all of the rules and will reap you some costly karma. Most of the people that I work with who are caught in a love triangle, were thrust into the situation by the actions of their lover, now, there are the rare cases in which a client will come to me who is holding onto one lover, all the while attempting to unite or reunite with an old flame, it is very difficult to start a relationship with someone new, when you are still clinging emotionally and mentally to the one that you are currently with out of the fear of being alone.
I know that there are a lot of what ifs? What if the one that I want doesn't want me? What happens if I let go of the one that I am with, and the one that I want doesn't come back to me? Chances are if you are holding onto someone just because you don't want to be alone, the one you want to be with will never come back to you, the universe has an all seeing eye, and you may think that you are getting away with something by cheating on the one you are with, but you are not, the all seeing eye of the mother is watching, evaluating your actions, weighing your good deeds against the bad, and if things do not balance out, you can forget about manifesting your goals.
Far be it for me to judge, I am not in the business to judge anyone, I leave that for a higher power, but, I am here to provide my clients with the best advice and guidance that I can offer, and while I have told a client or two to go out on a date and get laid, while waiting for their results from their spell casting to manifest, I have also told them not to fall in love, to do so would undermined their goal of reuniting with their ex, and I have never told any client that it is okay to lead someone on, because it is not, now, if you are of the mindset to date while you are working to reunite with your lover and providing that you are honest with those whom you choose to interact with, no harm, in fact, dating while waiting for the results from a spell casting will help keep your mind from overly obsessing about the one you desire to be with and it will keep your relationship energy from becoming stale, in observing the progress that my clients have made, those who decided to date while they were waiting for positive results from their spell casting, I can tell you that I have seen this approach work more often than not! My clients were able to date, get their sexual needs met, all the while working towards their goal of reuniting with their lover, one of the reasons that I feel this approach works is because it actually gives you something else to focus on, while still maintaining a positive focus on your desires, because if you overly focus on your desires to a point where it crosses the line into an obsession, that is not good, it is very unhealthy for you and it will be extremely detrimental to your overall goals and gravely undermined any and all ritual or spells that you may have done in order to reunite with the one that you love!
Think about how you felt, how raw your emotions were at the very moment you found out that your lover may have betrayed you for another, stop for a moment and project yourself back into those feelings, now, you cannot honestly sit there and tell me that you want to make another human being feel that way, and even if you are so angry at your ex, the one who betrayed you, you are taking out the pangs of your frustration on the wrong person, and you know that you are a better and bigger person than that, so rise above the situation, release the pain in your heart, make the decision right now that you are going to put your best foot forth, there is no need to create even more negative karma for yourself by dragging someone else into your drama, you have enough bad karma to work off with your ex-lover.
Your ex-lover treated you badly, shit all over your world and you still have a desire to reunite, and you still feel powerfully drawn to his or her energy in spite of all the bad that you have suffered, have you ever stopped and thought about why that is? I am sure a shrink would say that you have a poor self image, that your hatred for yourself is so strong that you are hell-bent on self destructing, and in some cases that may be true, but, in my experience when we are so taken with someone else it normally stems from the fact that we have an abundance of life lessons connected to that person, and part of our soul process in this lifetime is to work through those lessons, and settle our karmic debt, so we can move onto bigger and better things in our next plane of existence, but, most of my clients are not thinking in terms of their spirituality, their karma, or the progression of their soul, to many their desire manifest from their base need, or sexual and emotional need to be with the one that they love, whatever you call it, or however you choose to see it, the soul cannot evolve, progress successfully into its next life, without addressing the issues at hand, the life lessons that brought your soul into this incarnation to learn to begin with, and if you are constantly lashing out in anger, if you are constantly throwing tantrums because you are not getting your way, well, you haven't learned anything yet, you need to regroup and rethink your approach to your life.
Lashing out at someone who lashed out at you first is a natural reaction, now, that doesn't make it right, and I am not saying that it is necessarily wrong, because there is a time to stand and fight, just as there is a time to turn the other cheek, or turn and flee, but, when you are trying to attract, re-attract your mate, the allure of sweetness and honey works, where the bitterness of revenge doesn't. When you cast a spell or conduct a ritual to bring back your lover, you have to learn to gear your every action and thought to benefit your bottom line, before you act, you must stop and ask yourself how will this help me manifest my desires, and you have to learn to tell the difference between productive thoughts, and thoughts that are counter productive to your goals, a good example of a productive thought would be to stop and send the one you love a mental telegram telling him or her just how much you love and miss them.
Counter productive thoughts would be any thought that in no way benefits your bottom line, a good example would be constantly ill wishing the person that your lover may or may not be with, if you keep in mind that your thoughts will have just as much of an impact on you, as it has on the one you ill wish, it might be easy for you to break the ill wishing habit, and another example of a thought process that is counter productive to your goals and detrimental to your esoteric workings, would be questioning whether or not your magic is working, or is going to work for you, instead see positive results manifesting from your magic, your thoughts are powerful and you are a natural magnet, living in a world of positive and negative polarities.
Magic is as real as the light of day, and the dark of night, you do not have to believe in magic or the spirits that dwell in the esoteric realm for magic to impact or affect your life. I have seen believers made out of some of the most skeptical people, and I have seen some of the most religious, Christian, God fearing people brought to their knees by the impact of a hex, curse, or glimpse of the evil eye, and the only difference between black magic, and white magic is the will and the intent of the practitioner, any Witch who practices white magic, can lay a curse on you using dark magic, just like any Witch who practices black magic, can aid you through the process of white magic. I am not above using black magic, I have used it before, I am sure there will come a time that I will use it again, for my own personal karma, and for the sake of the karma of my clients, I submerged myself in the depths of white magic long ago, but, it may surprise you to learn that those counter productive thoughts that I talked about above, leans more into the dark realm of energy and that is why you must work to free yourself from that bad habit, because if you stop for a minute and think about what landed you in your current state of being, you might just find that you and your ex-lover both wallowed in a counter productive thought process that led to the demise of your relationship.
I would never tell any of my clients that they should not attempt to reunite with an ex-lover, for there is a reason that you are compelled to reunite with your lover, over the years there have been a few exceptions to this rule, in one case I told a female client that she should not try and attempt to reconcile with her ex-husband, in fact I refused to accept her as a client for that purpose, she got angry, she cried and told me that I was cruel, I told her that she would soon see why I felt as I did, a few months later she called and thanked me for holding true to my convictions, as it turned out her ex-husband was convicted for molesting the woman's children that he left her for, she said that she felt as though she dodged a bullet, and she did.
The bottom line is this, you have to learn to listen to your inner voice and to follow your heart, where your magic and your lover are concerned you are better off keeping your lips sealed and not discussing anything with those closest to you, for friends and family tend to be biased and may not understand your reasoning, and chances are they certainly may not agree with or understand your approach in bringing back your lover, when someone belittles you for what you are doing, when someone scoffs at your esoteric working, it takes positive energy away from the manifestation of your goals, because it will lead to the breakdown of your faith in yourself and your magic because "Nothing Succeeds Like A Secret".
The following words were actually taken from a ritual that I wrote, I posted it to the site for those of you who are going through similar situations, a message of hope and healing.
I pledged my love unconditionally to you, I swore to protect, respect and to keep you from harms way, I guess that I was the only one who took those vows seriously that day, that glorious day when you took my hand in yours and said I do! How was I supposed to know that you would be so quick to throw it all away? How was I supposed to know that forever to you was just a fleeting thing?
My love for you is true and will always be, nothing has changed other than you are so far away from me, when you left I was in shock and I sat by the phone for days awaiting your call, the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months and your call never came!
At times I strain my ears in the deafening silence listening for your footsteps coming down the hall; I even imagined once or twice that I heard your key turn in the lock and then I would snap back into reality when the neighbor's door across the hall would close and the tears would fall from my eyes like the rain falls from the sky, if I weren't so afraid that I would never see you again I would ask the Goddess to spare me of this pain, but the pain I must endure for it is the only thing that remains of you and me, I know that as long as I feel the pain as I do there is still hope that one day you will return to me and our love can start anew.
Our photographs are simply memories that have faded away and I struggle to recall the way that you look, the way that you feel and the way that you smell, I guess I am looking for any shred of hope to hang on to, fear fills my heart as I try to recreate the image of our love, a love once pure and strong, the kind that dreams are built on, our future once bright has grown dim and dinner for one isn't much to look forward to, but for now it is all I have, so it will have to do!
My friends and my family tell me that I am crazy and that I should move on with my life and find someone new, the few attempts that I have made have all been in vain, because I always end up comparing them to you and somehow they just never seem to measure up.
As I sit here tonight I wonder where you are and how you are doing? Do you ever miss me as much as I miss you? Have you ever felt as though you made a mistake by not giving our love a chance? Do you ever think of me and wonder how I am doing? Have you ever felt bad for those cruel things that you said to me just before you walked out the door? Have you ever thought about coming back and wondered if the door would still be open if you did? Have you ever hurt so bad that it felt as though your heart exploded in your chest?
The sadness of our separation is all around me; everywhere I look I see bits and pieces of you, a book on the coffee table, a glass sitting on the end table without a coaster, oh, how that use to drive me crazy, now I would give anything to see that again, I would even make a promise not to let the little things get under my skin. I guess it is true what they say, you never miss the water until the well runs dry and you don't know what you have until it is gone!
I was foolish and at times unappreciative of the little things, but I stood by your side through thick and thin and even though there were moments when I felt that it was too much or that I couldn't take anymore, I stopped and thought about the love that we share and it didn't take much for me to realize that the good times out weighed the bad, how could you not see that? Why couldn't your love for me sustain us? Why couldn't you realize that I loved you more than life itself?
Maybe that was my first mistake, maybe I should have stopped and thought about myself all those times that I bent over backwards trying to make you happy, if I had looked out for my best interest just a little bit closer, maybe I could have seen this coming, maybe your walking away and leaving me wouldn't have caught me off guard!
For such a longtime now I have been so angry, at times it is hard for me to tell whom I am the angriest at, you for hurting me so or me for allowing you to hurt me. I allowed you closer to my heart than I have ever allowed any other individual, with you my guard was totally down and I was yours for the taking, I gave myself to you unconditionally on every level and I trusted you, with me your word was everything, your word was worth more to me than all of the silver and gold in the world.
Today I hurt and the world has seemingly lost its luster, but tomorrow my pain will subside and my tears will dry, and my heart once split in two will once again be made whole and my happiness will no longer be dependent upon your return and one day my love, you will return for it is written in the stars above as I have been blessed by Venus the Goddess of love, my pain has been eased by the depths of Brigid's wells and she has inspired me to move forward in my life and Rhiannon the Celtic Goddess of forgiveness has made it possible for me to forgive you of your indiscretions and Corra the Goddess of prophecy has shown me the visions of the future and tomorrow is definitely brighter, and as you return to unite your energies with mine, all once wrong will be set right and balance will be restored within our lives and we shall reign once more as my love remains unconditionally true.
Blessed Be, Phelan